Better a Witty Fool than a Foolish Wit

Inner Workings of My Twisted Mind.

A Battle of Epic Proportions

I come from a long line of teachers.  Granparents, aunts, parents, all
are in the field of education.  And I know from personal experience
that they are all great at what they do.  I have the utmost respect
for educators, especially educators that work with kids that don’t
want to learn.

I’ve dabbled around in tutoring and training, but it wasn’t until
yesterday that I actually came face to face with what teachers are
actually up against.  And it’s not like I experienced the brunt of it,
just a frustrating little faction of how unmotivated kids can be.

I was working at the bookstore yesterday and a kid who couldn’t have
been more than 13 came up to me asking about bestsellers.  He wanted
to know if we had a section of bestsellers.  Now, like any bookstore,
the bestsellers are near the front of the store so I showed him where
they were, but that was not the end of this little terror.  Three
minutes later he asked again for bestsellers.  I got the feeling that
he wanted me to show him exactly what the bestsellers were.

Now, I don’t know how many of you have actually looked at a book
(apparently that kid hadn’t ever seen the cover of a bestseller)
because they advertise the shit out of the fact that any particular
book was or is a bestseller.  So I took this kid, who, judging by his
parents, was a spoiled little you know what, and started grabbing
every book that said bestseller on it.

Now here’s where I actually laughed out loud in the kid’s face.  Yeah,
I know I’m a bitch.  I have no problem laughing in a kid’s face when
he’s being ridiculous.  Hell, I have no problem laughing in anyone’s
face when they’re being ridiculous.  I know that being ridiculous is a
sort of L.A. thing, but I don’t buy into it and find endless amusement
in how damn seriously people take themselves (in all fairness, I had
no problem laughing at the same kind of people in Los Gatos or Aptos
or any other self-important group of rich people when I lived
elsewhere, so it’s not exclusively a trait specific to Los Angeles,
but it does seem abundant in the West Hollywood/Beverly Hills area).

But I digress…this kid actually scoffed at the books I handed him.
And, to tell you the truth, I did put some thought into the books
before it became obvious that this kid couldn’t care less what the
book was.  This revelation came when the kid scoffed, and then noted
that all the books I was handing him were ‘too long.’   Now, I’m not
feeding this kid War and Peace.  Hell, I didn’t even give him John
Irving.  I was giving him books that were around 300 Pages long.

I’m sorry, but I can read that in a day.  I know that not everyone
can, but 300 pages is not that many even for high school.  I swear, it
took all my might not to just slap the kid. Like I said, I did laugh
out loud at this point.  And promptly gave him a novel that was about
150 pages long.

So I said earlier that I’m a mean nasty bitch.  This is probably the
reason that if I ever go into teaching, I’ll be teaching college.  I
have not one ounce of patience for that shit.  I almost walked away
and just said find the damn book yourself.  Then it caught my eye.
Just released on paperback in a nice aquamarine colored cover.

I gave the kid Everyman by Philip Roth.  Have fun with your short book kid.

Peace, Love, and Vindictiveness,


P.S.  Thank you to all my teachers and my family who are teachers for
putting up with that kind of shit.  I would just slap them.  You’re
better people than I am and my deepest thanks for molding the minds
that will allow you.

June 14, 2007 - Posted by | Education, High School, Los Angeles

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