Better a Witty Fool than a Foolish Wit

Inner Workings of My Twisted Mind.


I’m not an American Idol fan, per say.  My roommate, however, is.  Thus I often end up watching it.  Now, in all honesty before this season I had never seen a full episode of American Idol.  I, in theory, find it to be disgusting.  For weeks they show all these completely delusional people who think that they can sing and are just absolutely awful.  And then you have to hear Simon Cowell berate them.  I mean, it shouldn’t be entertaining, but it kind of is.  I think it plays on that, ‘well at least I’m not that deluded’ kind of emotion.  And after the weeks of bad performances are over we finally get to the good performances where things can range from unbelievably painful to entertaining and wonderful.  

One of the biggest problems I have with American Idol is the fact that about 60 Million people vote for it.  Let me give you a little statistic.  120 Million people vote for president.  Yes that’s right.  Half the amount of people that vote for president vote for American Idol…it’s insane.  I don’t think I would have as big a problem with it if it wasn’t so popular (much the same way I feel about CSI and The Beatles).  
I will say this.  Even with all these things working against it, I’ve taken to watching it.  Yeah, you read that right.  I now watch American Idol.  I mean, don’t get me wrong, I don’t get antsy if I miss it and it’s not one of my I must watch this shows, but I have been enjoying it.  And I think the reason I like it is, even though it is supposed to create huge pop stars, it is filled with cool edgy people and cool edgy performers, and I like it.  In fact, it seems like the people who would have been pop stars 10 years ago, the young blonde girls who are pretty good singers, but not great singers, are getting kicked off and I love it.  I love that it seems like ‘America’ wants an edgier pop star because with the state of music and the white-breadness of rock, we can use someone with some edge.  That’s why Amy Winehouse is making such an impact, she’s a bad girl, and we need that.  We need another Guns ‘N’ Roses, where people show up to talk show interviews and drink Jack Daniels on stage.  So if American Idol can give us that than I support it.  
American Idol is definitely a mixed bag for me.  I like it but I hate how consumerist it is.  The day after Idol airs you can go on iTunes and download the songs.  A few weeks ago one of the contestants sang ‘Hallelujah’ by Leonard Cohen, but he did the Jeff Buckley version (which is freaking amazing) and Jeff Buckley’s version was the number one download on iTunes for like a week.  As much as I love Jeff Buckley, it makes me sad that an American Idol has to sing a song in order for people to listen to it and discover it.  And at one point last night, in a completely staged event, Ryan Seacrest did promotion for the iPhone and AT&T.  Great!
That being said, my favorite parts of Idol are the judges.  Holy crap are they entertaining.  First, you’ve got Randy Jackson who is throwing up the peace sign, calling everyone dawg, cause he’s so street.  Let tell you something people, the only street Randy Jackson is around is Beverly Glen.  He’s Bel-Air, that’s what kind of street Randy Jackson is.  So I find intense pleasure from his ‘street’ persona.  Paula Abdul is my favorite judge, simply because of the fact that she is so obviously on drugs. I’m sure her prescription pill bill is in the five or six digit numbers because that lady is just a wreck.  That being said, she is endlessly entertaining.  She can barely get full sentences out (and often doesn’t), she gets the ‘I’m fucked up’ droopy eye, and Simon endlessly makes fun of her.  I love it.  She also rarely talks about the performance.  In that, ‘I’m stoned’ way, she discusses how people are dressed, the philosophy of their sound, the philosophy of their persona, basically, she is a gem.  Then there’s Simon, who often calls Paula out on the fact that she cannot speak English correctly, or sometimes at all.  And he’s the only one of them who gives real true harsh critique.  I’m sorry, but artists need critique.  They need honest critique, otherwise, how are you going to get better.  I’ve worked around enough artists who need to constantly have their egos stroked to know that it is not the best way to go about doing things, it makes them egotistical and it makes them not want to improve.  So yeah, I like Simon for that reason.
The one thing that I truly can’t stand, and thank god for TiVo that I can fast forward through it, is Ryan Seacrest.  Okay, who make him famous?  He was a radio jockey in L.A. and he should have stayed that way.  He wasn’t even a good radio jockey.  He had a crappy television show for a season and then all of a sudden he blows up and is hosting everything.  He’s fucking annoying people.  He’s not funny.  He’s not good looking.  He’s not talented.  He stands up and announces American Idol and has awkward conversations with the contestants their performances where mostly he just asks how they feel.  News flash, that’s not talent.  I’m sure he’s raking in money by the truckloads (he’s definitely raking in enough to ‘hide’ his sexuality from the American Public for some unknown reason.  As if it isn’t obvious that he prefers the company of men.  But just come out with it Ryan, America won’t hate you because you’re gay, we hate you because you suck), and I’m sure that he is a complete ass but really I feel like even Regis Philbin would be better than Ryan Seacrest or Joan Rivers, that would be highly entertaining.  She could give Paula a run for her money on who’s doing more drugs.  In any case, Ryan’s got to go.
And I’m out of the closet on my affinity for American Idol.  I expect to be mocked.
Peace, Love and Bad T.V.


March 19, 2008 - Posted by | Culture, Hollywood, Television

1 Comment »

  1. simon and paula just put on an act, they know that when paula acts wacky and simon is rude to her and the contestants, everyone will talk about them and watch their show. if they both acted normal and professional all the time, nobody would care. that is why they act wacky/rude

    Comment by haha | March 19, 2008 | Reply

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