Better a Witty Fool than a Foolish Wit

Inner Workings of My Twisted Mind.

Driving Miss Callahan

So I live in Koreatown in Los Angeles. I grew up in what I think may be the most politically correct town in America and was seriously startled the first time I heard someone make a comment about a person based on their race (when I lived in London). I never understood because I grew up so sheltered from any kind of judgement. It shocked me that stereotypes were actually true, even though I fit in to many of them…Hello, I’m Irish. I drink. I’m Italian. I eat. Those are stereotypes and I fit them. But before I moved to London and then Los Angeles, I never really got stereotypes. Like I knew what they were, but wasn’t sure why they were.

Like I said, I live in Koreatown…if we’re talking about stereotypes Asian Driving is a big one. But I realized something the other day. I think that driving, for the most part, does not settle along racial lines. No no. I mean, there are bad drivers in every single ethnic group and good drivers in every ethnic group. Personally, I think that that the real stereotypes should fall along socio-economic lines. Yeah, that’s right, I said it. But it’s not what you think…I promise.

I was driving through Beverly Hills last night and all of this sort of hit me like a ton of bricks. As I sat behind some kind of hybrid SUV that I didn’t recognize (one of those ones that costs more than I make in a year), traveling at approximately 19 miles per hour down Wilshire Blvd. I realized that race had nothing to do with driving skills and yearly income had everything to do with it.

Anyone who knows Los Angeles, and even those who don’t, should know that Wilshire Blvd, like Van Ness in San Francisco or Lakeshore Drive in Chicago is one of those main thoroughfares that cut the city. They are streets that lead everywhere and usually the easiest way to get anywhere is to take these roads. They move fast and move lots of people through, they get the job done. And as such, barring rush hour traffic, the speed usually stays planted above 19 mph. But every time I drive through Beverly Hills I find myself pulling hair from the roots, turning the music up in an effort to distract myself from the desire to ram my Honda Civic into the back of a Bentley.

That’s right, I’m coming out and saying it…rich people are the absolute worst drivers, they don’t give a shit that anyone else is on the road and drive that way. They drive slow in their $300,000 cars and they make absolutely everyone around them crazy as they straddle the center line of a two lane thoroughfare so that no one can get by. That’s right, I live in a part of the city that, stereotypically speaking, should be exceedingly frustrating to drive in, but I find that the real problem lies in when the median income starts stretching into the seven figure range. My solution…nuke Beverly Hills. Maybe our new president can get on that.

Peace, Love, and Bad Rich Drivers,


January 21, 2009 - Posted by | Uncategorized

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